Alcohol, Cigarettes, Caffeine and Pregnancy

This is a very important section of the pregnancy avoidance textbook. I have listed it as things as I do not know what to class cigarettes as other than killers! Ok, don't get too cross with me if you are a smoker, but it really is a dangerous addiction to have, let alone expose a developing baby to them.
Here goes:

1. Alcohol is a bad one and you should try and avoid it as much as possible. Drinking alcohol when pregnant can have adverse affects on your unborn baby and excessive drinking while pregnant can cause Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, symptoms of which are a smaller than average head, poor coordination, learning problems and deformed facial features. One to two units of alcohol a week are said to be fine, but don't exceed that limit. Remember that Alcohol also dehydrates you and this is very important for maintaining plump healthy cells throughout you and your babies forming body.

2. Cigarettes! I cannot stress this enough and I am an ex smoker. Apart from over FOUR THOUSAND toxic substances lacing your cigarette, including Formaldehyde, which then floods your and your babies body and bloodstream when you take a drag, you also deprive your unborn baby of oxygen every time you inhale cigarette smoke. Stopping smoking should be your top priority.

3. Caffeine is also unfortunately considered a bad one and should be avoided. Everyone feels the pain of not having that cup of coffee in the morning but it is a blink in the ocean of time while you are pregnant and if you cant cut it out, cut down to the very max of one cup a day. Remember that it is associated with an increased risk of miscarriage, a lower birth weight and it reduces your ability to absorb iron. Caffeine is also found in chocolate, fizzy drinks and headache pills so be aware of what you are buying.

At this point, you may be starting to freak out a little at the imminent removal of these beloved things from your life albeit temporarily. Perhaps a lot. Please, these things do not even make it onto the list of lowest priorities when you are embarking on such a miraculous journey as that of creating a new life. Speaking from experience, you wake up one morning and your beautiful baby is three months old and you wonder what happened to the time.

What I am really saying is that the time you spend being pregnant and doing without these toxic little luxuries goes by as quickly as the blink of an eye. In my mind I still see myself as a skinny, sexy nineteen year old who can whip the clubbing crowds into a frenzy with my djing, fag and vodka in hand. Then I walk past a shop window, see my thirty something reflection and realise how fast it all goes by.

In a nutshell, to cut these three things out so that your baby is as healthy and armed with strength and intelligence as you are able to give is all that matters. And I can guarantee that you will feel so much better for it!

Fern Joseph is a mother of three who is passionate about pregnancy and general nutrition

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